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Here’s the thing about teaching English in China: it’s a way in. “The people who come for the experience, I feel, are the most valuable people you can have in a place like Beijing because they’re learning about themselves, and you never know what somebody might be able to do until they arrive in a place like this,” says Matt Jones, an English teacher who’s using his years of experience — teaching “communication” and “culture” as much as anything else, as he puts it — to start his own school. “If the ticket is English teaching, why not use that ticket?”

He shares more insights with John Artman and The Good Doctor on this episode of The Creamcast. Making an appearance in the conversation is the famous Chad Lager (recently departed, alas), who used to share an apartment with Jones. Who learned from whom, business-wise?

Download Episode 5 of The Creamcast here, or listen to it on iTunes.

|The Creamcast Archives|

Theme song sampled from Löhstana David’s ”Demain je change de vie,” and our logo is by Katie. This episode was recorded at the offices of Vericant.

Follow John Artman @knowsnothing and The Good Doctor @doctorentropy2. You may also be interested in Doc’s current Kickstarter, Quitting the Grave.

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Lottie Dowling is single. How this is, we may never know, considering this Kiwi is smart, cute, and funny, as evidenced by her co-founding of Improv Beijing, the original improv group in China. Here she is:

Guys: go date this girl. You can tweet at her, but only if you promise not to be creepy.

Get to know her better in this latest episode of our podcast, hosted by the remarkably-bad-at-improv duo of John Artman and The Good Doctor.

Download Episode 4 of The Creamcast here, or listen to it on iTunes.

|The Creamcast Archives|

Theme song sampled from Löhstana David’s ”Demain je change de vie,” and our logo is by Katie. This episode was recorded at the offices of Vericant.

Follow John Artman @knowsnothing and The Good Doctor @doctorentropy2. You may also be interested in Doc’s current Kickstarter, Quitting the Grave.

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Amy Daml of Coon Creek, Minnesota has had a productive first year in China, braving TCM, Chinese grannies, and sex scenes in movies (alas, just as a voice actress, with her sexy, sexy voice). Listen to her charm the pants off our hosts, John Artman and The Good Doctor, in the latest episode of The Creamcast.

You can also catch Daml (pronounced Dam-ol) on China Radio International’s Easy Cafe (Mon-Fri, 8-10 pm).

Download Episode 3 of The Creamcast here, or listen to it on iTunes.

|The Creamcast Archives|

Theme song sampled from Löhstana David’s ”Demain je change de vie.” Image by Katie.  This episode was recorded at the offices of Vericant.

Follow John Artman @knowsnothing and The Good Doctor @doctorentropy2. You may also be interested in Doc’s current Kickstarter, Quitting the Grave.

Download podcast | Size: 38.1 MB

Sam Goodman is a Beijing oldie, having first moved here in 1995. In 1997 he was among the first foreigners to open a shop in the food-and-beverage industry, the sandwich chain Sammie’s. He has since written a book, Where East Eats West, and gone on to start an assortment of projects, which you can read about here.

Join hosts John Artman and The Good Doctor as they talk to Goodman about his ventures and adventures, including the time in Thailand he watched a fellow rock climber almost die after plummeting 55 meters.

Download Episode 2 of The Creamcast here, or listen to it on iTunes.

|The Creamcast Archives|

Theme song sampled from Löhstana David’s “Demain je change de vie.” Image by Katie. This episode was recorded at the offices of Vericant.

Follow John Artman @knowsnothing and The Good Doctor @doctorentropy2. You may also be interested in Doc’s current Kickstarter, Quitting the Grave.

Download podcast | Size: 55.9

We’re launching a podcast! On the occassion of Episode 1, featuring Frank Yu, The Creamcast hosts John Artman and The Good Doctor are here to answer some questions.

What is a podcast?

Doc: Podcasts are the future. Not in the way 3D movies are the future of Hollywood, but in the way Apple TV is the future of television. No one enjoys being forced to watch Star Trek: The Wrath of Sherlock in crappy stereoscopic vision, but everyone likes getting their entertainment on demand, consuming it whenever and wherever you want, on whatever device you have at hand.

Can you masturbate while listening to one?

John: There’s a fine line between being honest and giving too much information. Suffice it to say that, yes, you can masturbate listening to a podcast. However, it is my personal belief that while stimulating yourself physically, it can be quite distracting, and psychologically challenging, to also attempt aural stimulation.

But… I mean… Creamcast.

Doc: The Creamcast, Beijing Cream’s new podcast, has the potential to be that friend you’ve always wanted but never had the courage to go talk to. Or maybe it will be the intrusive third wheel in the threesome you hoped to avoid. Either way, it’s an experience you’ll never forget. Hosted by John Artman and myself, the Creamcast is a conversational podcast in the tradition of The Nerdist or WTF. Each week a guest with intimate knowledge of expat life in Beijing comes on to make confessions and create scandal. It’s like porn, but for your ears.

John: We would love for you to share with us, either in the comments section or via email, any and all experiences you have with using our voices to pleasure yourself.

Tell me more. 

Doc: The best way to listen to podcasts is through iTunes. If you have an iPhone or iPad, you can use the Podcast app. Otherwise, you can find the podcasts tab in the iTunes store. Don’t worry, pretty much every podcast is free, and paid for by Audible or Stamps.com. With either method, you can search for specific podcasts or scroll through the most popular. It’s easy to subscribe to the ones you like, and then your phone or computer will automatically download the latest episode as soon as it’s posted. It couldn’t be easier.

John: If you don’t do Apple, Android offers podcast apps such as OneCast or Podkicker. I’ve never actually seen a Windows phone, but I’m guessing they offer a podcast app as well, though it will probably come with plenty of pop-up spam. Once you have the app installed, you’ll be able to search for Creamcast and subscribe to it much the same as in iTunes.

Doc, I know you like dinosaurs. Perhaps you’d like to talk about dinosaurs?

Doc: Alternatively, every podcast must be hosted somewhere on the web apart from Apple servers. So if you want to listen to Creamcast and you don’t have any kind of subscription service, you can go straight to Beijing Cream or SoundCloud and download it to your computer or phone. You can even listen to it online, but that’s a little like hunting dinosaurs with a technology that’s much older than dinosaurs — say, something that would have been used to hunt trilobites.

Who’s this John Artman fellow, and why does he sound familiar? 

John: You might remember me from such podcasts as Artman Talks and China Punks. If not, then you definitely don’t remember my work at China Radio International for China Drive (91.5 FM) or Today on Beyond Beijing (846 FM). I’ve also written some amazingly forgettable technology posts for Beijing Cream, such as Huawei makes phones for Giants and Mandiant is Stoopid.

Fantastic. Who’s the first guest?

Doc: We sit down with Frank Yu of Kwestr and chat about getting into fights, dealing with model girlfriends, and why Beijing is better than Shanghai. Also, things get testy when Frank fails his trivia quiz at the end.

Our episode with Frank is embedded below, and can be downloaded here. (We’re working on getting it on iTunes. UPDATE: On iTunes!) Be sure to check out The Creamcast every Friday afternoon henceforth. (Logo credit: Katie.)

|The Creamcast Archives|

Part of the theme song was from Löhstana David’s “Demain je change de vie.” This episode was recorded at the offices of Vericant.

Ed’s note: The Good Doctor and I attended the 3rd annual Beijing International Film Festival on April 23 at the China National Convention Center. You can read my write-up here. The following is The Good Doctor’s work.

Jay Chou performs at the closing ceremony of the Beijing International Film Festival. I was lucky enough to be able to film, though I wasn’t very close to the stage. Enjoy the spectacle as Hollywood collides with the Chinese Film and Television industry.

Special thanks to Josh Halpern.

Previously: A Sleighful of Santas. |Beijing Slice Archives|

The Stand-up Showcase portion of the Beijing Improv Festival took place this past Friday. Here’s my takeaway after watching the five finalists:

It turns out that there’s an honest-to-goodness, thriving stand-up scene in Beijing. If you’re a closeted comedy nerd who’ll only risk coming out to see live shows in Beijing when big name comics fly in from the States, I hate to break it to you, but Louis CK isn’t walking back onto that stage anytime soon. Why not try to get a laugh on at one of the many local venues in Beijing that host regular stand-up nights? These include weekly Wednesday night shows at the Hot Cat Club, among others.

The notable stand-ups from Friday’s showcase were Jehan Azad (a.k.a. Jay Zaad), Paul Creasy, and the evening’s grand prize winner, Sherwin Jiang. Watch their performances here — and watch for when they take the mic next. Because unless we pool our money and fly Marc Maron out to Beijing, they’re the best we have.

The Good Doctor is a writer in Beijing. Check out his website, The Chaos Factory, and follow him on Twitter @doctorentropy2.

Ed’s note: Dominic Swire has posted all the finalists on Youku, plus two bonus videos. In order: Host Toby Jarman kicks things off, followed by Jay Zaad, Calvin Pollak, Sherwin Jiang, David Fertitta and Paul Creasy, topped off by the final awards. Below, we sample Jehan “I’m not making fun of black people” Azad and Paul “English and middle class” Creasy. The above video is of the aforementioned winner, Sherwin “shabi” Jiang.

The 2013 Beijing Improv Comedy Festival is taking place right now. Here’s what you need to know and what you don’t about this premier comedy event:

Who? Improv troupes from all over the world, including the Philippines, Australia, and comedy hotbed Turkey, as well as throughout China. But does it really matter? All you care about is whether or not they are funny.

When and Where? It’s happening right now, at the Penghao Theater, until April 21. It began April 10. Go to Beijing Improv’s website for the schedule.

How was improv invented? Commedia dell’Arte is a form of theater characterized by masked “types,” beginning in Italy in the 16th century, and was responsible for the advent of the actress and improvised performances based on sketches or scenarios. But remember, no one likes a trivia nerd.

Now onto the “what you need to know” part.

Is the festival worth going to? Will Ferrel, Amy Poehler, Ryan Stiles, Andy Kaufmann, and Kristen Wiig are just a few examples of improvisors who will not be at the festival. But those people are totally over-played, and some of them are dead. Instead, you’ll get to enjoy living comedians who really care about making sure the audience has a good time, not just when their next movie deal is going to come through.

Which shows are can’t-miss? You’ll definitely want to check out the stand-up showcase on Friday night at 10, as well as the Mix and Match all star improv show on Sunday night at 6. The Manila-based group SPIT is also can’t-miss, but they performed last Saturday, so it looks like you’ve already missed it.

Is it easy to pick up the performers? Yes! Every one of the performers is single. In fact, the whole reason they got into comedy is because they wanted to make it easier to meet people. Please go up to them after the show and make your intentions known.

Will I get to participate in the shows? Yes! Improv is all about audience participation. Pro Tip: When they ask for suggestions, please don’t yell out “dildo.” Everyone yells out dildo. Instead, yell “double-sided dildo.” They’ve probably never heard that one before.

The Good Doctor is a writer in Beijing. Check out his website, The Chaos Factory, and follow him on Twitter @doctorentropy2. He previously reviewed Caochangdi’s Beijing Design Week.

When I think of happy bears, I think of Baloo from The Jungle Book or George Wendt and Chris Farley. I absolutely do  not think of Asiatic black bears that have been imprisoned since birth in order to extract bile from their gall bladders.

But I guess Fang Shuting, head of the Chinese Association of Traditional Chinese Medicine (TCM), has a different way of looking at the practice. “The process of extracting bear bile is like turning on a tap: natural, easy and without pain,” he says, as quoted in IHT Rendezvous. “After they’re done, the bears can even play happily outside. I don’t think there’s anything out of the ordinary! It might even be a very comfortable process!”

Happy. Today, at least six bears do finally have a reason to be happy, as they have been rescued from an illegal bile farm in Sichuan province by the good folks at Animal Asia. The traumatized bears will be provided medical care and allowed to recover from a lifetime of caged living that often restricted them from even turning around.

The animals, commonly known as moon bears, are prized by practitioners of TCM for their bile, which is thought to be efficacious in reducing fevers, protecting the liver, improving eyesight, breaking down gallstones, and acting as an anti-inflammatory. Detractors claim that not only is the farming inhumane, but unnecessary as well, as there are numerous herbal and synthetic alternatives in Chinese medicine that are just as effective.

Animals Asia is devoted to shutting down bear farms and bringing an end to the bile trade. They have more than 250 rescued bears at their sanctuaries in China and Vietnam, where the animals are allowed to live out their natural lives free from abuse. You can follow them on Twitter here.

According to the Rendezvous article: “While the Chinese government is taking action against some bear farms, it’s not illegal here if farms have licenses for it. About 10,000 bears are believed to be caged for their bile in China and a couple thousand in Vietnam.”

Much like public perception of shark fin soup and dog meat, more people may be turning away from bear bile, too. One Sina Weibo user, according to Rendezvous, wrote, “I don’t believe it at all that extracting bile is as easy and comfortable as Fang said. Why doesn’t he extract the bile from his body in the same way to prove it?” We can only hope more people share that sentiment.

Rescuing China’s Bears From Bile Farms, One by One (International Herald Times)

Ed’s note: The one you’ve been waiting for: The Good Doctor follows more than 100 merry Santas during the December 8 Beijing SantaCon.

What is the collective noun for Santas? I’m not exactly sure, but we definitely need one after this.

The music is Santa Claus Is Coming To Town, performed by the Tracson 5.

Previously: Behind the Scenes with Beijing Improv. |Beijing Slice Archives|

Photo from last week: a day like any other, only the sun is melting and we’re all going to die. Or the sun admires itself in the water and bends down for a closer look. Or…

By The Good Doctor

Ever wonder what would happen if you fuck with the public works department in Beijing? If you’re like this unfortunate car owner, your vehicle will get paved over by a thick layer of asphalt. Let these photos (and video) be a warning.

To see Beijing’s latest installation piece, head over to Dongsi Shi’er Tiao hutong. I’m pretty sure the car won’t have moved since I saw it there on Friday.

We visit the folks at Beijing Improv, where you should always expect the unexpected.

Notes: Beijing Improv holds free, bilingual workshops every Wednesday night at the Hot Cat Club, as well as a theater show on the last Saturday of every month. You can find out more information here.

Previously: Climbing the Waterfall. |Beijing Slice Archives|

Some of Beijing’s best expat climbers they take on the waterfall at Bai He. Featuring Simon Adams, Ben Cook, Dave Gliddon, and Joachim Corstiaans. To learn more about climbing in and around Beijing, visit Beijing Climbing Club.

The music featured in this episode is Begging In Rome by Cut By Ice and Départ by OpenChords.

Previously: Beijing’s Cheapest Haircut. |Beijing Slice Archives|

Ed’s note: In lieu of Beijing Slice, here’s The Good Doctor’s video wrap-up of Beijing Design Week.

Via The Good Doctor‘s Vimeo description: An introduction to the 2012 Beijing Design Week at Cao Chang Di. The video focuses on three designers, Carl de Smet, Nikolaus Wabnitz, and Nicole Condon, and highlights their exhibits from Design Week. Special thanks to Jon Korkidis and RAWR! Labs.

Featured Music:

Time Go To by Chill Carrier

At Peace by Chill Carrier

Swinger Tubies By L’onomatopeur

|Beijing Slice Archives|