Introducing, In China: A Perfect Cut Of Aesthetic Hell

Chinese townhouses in Hainan
Our analysis of this tenement precinct found in Lingshui county, Hainan province begins with the seminal modernist architect Louis Sullivan's famous phrase "form follows function." Buildings should be designed with their purpose in mind, and so it is philosophically laid out here, in this neighborhood, that the purpose of all human life is to sprout like a blade of grass out of red dirt, sway in the wind, and die. All joy is subsumed by the reality of existing. Not one wasted word is spent. You are because you are. Accept it, for residents of Dadun Village are all engaged in the process of death or already dead.

GitHub Blocked In China Thanks To The Railway Ministry’s Crappy Ticketing Site [UPDATE]

Ministry of Railway image
The Golden Shield Project (aka Great Firewall of China) has decided GitHub no longer conforms with Chinese notions of harmony, as first noticed Monday by GreatFire.org and reported on The Next Web. The block comes on the heels of the Ministry of Railways's unsuccessful attempt to convince Chinese browser-makers to stop providing a plugin that helps users purchase train tickets off MOR's website.

Another Zoo Incident In China: Man Bites Ostrich To Death

Man kills ostrich featured image
Mental health issues are no laughing matter, and neither is biting a large flightless bird to death. What to call this then? At a zoo in Guangdong province on Saturday, a man bit and killed a live ostrich in front of elders and children, then laid on the dead bird and made gun motions with his finger at the police. The man, 27-year-old Li, was found with a suicide note in his pocket addressed to his mother and girlfriend.

Now It’s Gilbert Arenas’s Turn To Hit A Game-Winning Shot

Gilbert Arenas game-winner
Less than a week after Tracy McGrady drilled a game-winner on the road against Liaoning, this season's other big import from the NBA, Gilbert Arenas, showed everyone he has some clutch bones in him as well. With the clock winding down and the Shanghai Sharks down 94-93 in Nanjing, on the home court of the Jiangsu Dragons, Arenas made his move, which you can watch in the video above.

Baidu Autofill Reinforces Stereotype That Americans Love Sluts

Baidu American consulate search 4
Surely you’re aware of the Google autofill / autocomplete meme? For instance, someone types the words “i accidentally” into a Google search bar as part of a longer phrase, but Google presumes you’re too lazy to finish your five-word sentence, so it helpfully offers a pulldown list of possible searches such as “i accidentally the whole... Read more »

Tianjin Coach Gary Gaspard Had To Be Physically Restrained After Sunday’s CBA Debacle

Gary Gaspard Tianjin vs Qingdao post-game 1
What words do we have left for Sunday's colossal wreck of a basketball scrum between Qingdao and Tianjin, in which the two teams were whistled for a combined 89 fouls (an average of one and a half fouls per minute), shot 119 combined free throws, and each had three players foul out? I wrote that it was "how bad basketball can look when entrusted to the wrong people." NiuBBall's Jon Pastuszek called it an "abomination," "nightmare" and "pathetic." Andrew Crawford of Shark Fin Hoops tweeted, "In Chinese basketball, the biggest problem remains the standard of refereeing." It was a sad day indeed for fans of the CBA.

If You Act Now, You Can Be The Proud Owner Of One Of 10,000 Luxury Homes Abandoned By Officials Too Rich To Care

Luxury house
Are you interested in property with garish golden columns and statues of boys urinating, Hello Kitty doorbells and fluffy pink wallpaper? Now’s your chance: the fire sale of all fire sales in now on! As The Telegraph reports: Luxury properties are being dumped on the market in Beijing, Shanghai and Guangzhou for anyone able to... Read more »

Watch As 45 Passersby Ignore An 87-Year-Old Man Who Falls And Can’t Get Up

Wang samaritan featured image
Recently in Chongqing, an 87-year-old man surnamed Wang stumbled and fell outside his building in a residential community. He laid there for a full five minutes before a security guard helped him up. A surveillance camera recorded 45 people, reportedly, ignore him. Near the end of Wang's ordeal, a group of people surrounded him and rubbernecked as if he were a car accident. Finally, two security guards helped him back to his apartment.