Nature: Ring, ring
Man: Not now, Nature, I'm in the car.
Nature: Ring, ring, bitch.
Man: Nature, I said I'm in the goddamn c--
Nature: DON'T YOU DARE SASS ME WHEN I'M RINGING, HOMO ERECTUS, OR HAVE YOU FORGOTTEN WHAT I DID TO YOUR LAST LADY FRIEND?
Man, sighs:
Why thank you, Sina. Wait, are you referring to me? Do I pass the decency test? God, now I am unsure. Let us bounce this to the masses. Sometimes I drink too much, but I’m never violent unless it involves executing a professional wrestling move such as the spear onto a friend into bushes or... Read more »
Global Times’s Shan Renping used his pulpit to defend Yang Rui today, writing: We think Yang’s wording was too harsh. He only stressed the problems of illegal immigrants in China without mentioning the contributions other foreigners have made to the country. He slammed many foreigners, which made it a media sensation and led to misunderstanding... Read more »
By Valentina Luo It looks like someone not only watched last year’s The Founding of a Party, but actually paid attention. A group of Chinese scientists are rumored to have “founded” the Chinese Scientist Liberal Democratic Party [中国科学家自由民主党], news of which we first noticed in the Chinese edition of Epoch Times on May 1. The Epoch Times, as parlance goes, is... Read more »
I think the top featured comment on YouTube from TheOmerShow sums up how I feel about the two pairs of couples who tied the knot at a marine park in China:
Last night’s Dialogue, embedded after the jump, was about the NATO Summit in Chicago. The two foreign guests were Einar Tangen (“Biz Times columnist & author” [Biz Times is a business paper in Milwaukee]) and Francesco Sisci, Sole 24 Ore columnist. They misspelled Mr. Sisci’s name. Maybe it’s time to lighten up on the chaps who produce Dialogue,... Read more »
Because of ads like the above. No one — and I mean NO ONE, except possibly Horst Schultz, who holds the record for “greatest distance attained for a jet of semen” — has the ability to piss with that arc and that range, not to mention enough velocity to ensure minimal — i.e. NONE, because... Read more »
I first encountered the following diagram — origins unknown* — two or three years ago, but considering it was revived as recently as a month ago — I noticed a bunch of friends passing it around on Facebook — it’s possible it’s been around even longer. And why not? Everything depicted is true, more or less:... Read more »