Congratulations, Royston Chan. You’ve Just Written The Most Disgusting China Story Of The Year

Eggs - or THE URINE EGGS OF VIRGIN BOYS?
Oh, where do we begin? With the virgins or the urine? With the eggs or the soaking of said eggs in the urine of virgins? How does a story on Reuters -- written by Royston Chan (broaching poaching topics no one else will) -- that begins like this: It's the end of a school day in the eastern Chinese city of Dongyang, and eager parents collect their children after a hectic day of primary school. Get to here:

Traffic Light: Walking Head-On Into Traffic Is Not Advisable

Walking head on into traffic
Traffic Light (红绿灯) is a show on Beijing Television (BTV) that airs an ostensibly instructional segment called “Accidents That Should Never Happen.” Everything about it is ridiculous. The only way to make it more ridiculous is to watch it in slow motion, set to music. The song in this video is Zhong Chi - Easy World《钟茌》.

China Net Nanny Tightens Vise?

Mistress in Beijing
There's been some chatter on Reddit this morning about "getting a whole lot more firewall today," and speculation is that it has something to do with Neil Heywood, alleged British spy. (Don't google him without a VPN unless you want a connection reset.)

The Atlantic Sheds Stark, Sable Light On China

The Atlantic - In Focus
The Atlantic’s latest In Focus series. Sometimes it takes a black light to get the eyes to focus on what’s important. Start here: a country struggling to balance the needs of 1.4 billion people with that of the natural environment. With this most basic of conflict in mind, work your way down, to a bird’s-eye view of a... Read more »

“Awesome Basketball Kid”: The Jeremy Lin Story [UPDATE]

Linsanity Lives
Reports of Linsanity’s demise have been greatly exaggerated. For one, he’s still starting. For another, his inspirational story of hard work, perseverance, and being Asian is coming to the silver screen. This was only a matter of time, wasn’t it? According to China Daily, a Beijing-based culture and media company called Lafeng Entertainment is in preproduction... Read more »

A Kickstarter Project Worth Your Attention: Chinafornia

Chinafornia
Chinafornia is The Daily Show meets The Simpsons, California meets China. In other words, a live-action version of China Daily Show meets Beijing Cream! (Too far?) We don’t see how it can go wrong, especially in the expert hands of animator and filmmaker (writer/producer/etc.) Ellie Lee, a five-time Emmy Award nominee and the brains behind this project. Like many... Read more »

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Eat Your Hearts Out, Other Trucks Of The World

Not at all dangerous
H/T Alicia Ram Trucks may puff out its chest and boast about its reinforced steel gauges and heavy-duty axles that supposedly give its 1500 Tradesman Heavy Duty the best payload and towing in class, but have any Ram Truck drivers stacked three in one? Reports Global Times (with an assist to web.orange.co.uk): Cargo firm boss Sun Lin... Read more »

Another Guangdong Basketball Higher-Up Calls For A Hit, This Time Hurting An Innocent Beijing Woman

I'm not a lip reader, but...
Left: Su Wei; right: Liu Hongjiang (photoshopped, obviously; via Weibo) Sports fans can be vicious, especially when given anonymity and — this is very important — assent from authority to unleash their anger. I mention this latter part because it seems that Liu Hongjiang, head boss of the Guangdong Hongyuan Southern Tigers, has instigated a... Read more »

Some Hong Kongers React To Election Results By Comparing New Chief Executive To Hitler

u bad bro?
Via Dictionary of Politically Incorrect Hong Kong Cantonese Bit much, guys? CY Leung (梁振英) (a.k.a. Leung Chun-ying) has beaten scandal-ridden Henry Tang and pro-democracy candidate Albert Ho today to become Hong Kong’s new chief executive, securing 689 of the election committee’s votes. Tang was probably Beijing’s preferred choice, but he managed only 285 votes, his... Read more »

The Chinese In America: This Poet-Ping-Pong Champion Is Awesome

Chinese poet ping pong champion featured image
His name is Xue Di, and according to the Providence Journal, he is a dissident Chinese poet who has been "the league champion at the Rhode Island Table Tennis Association in Manville" for 10 straight years. How do we start listing the ways in which this is awesome? With his voice, which rises a few octaves when he gets excited? With the fact that this video is entirely about ping pong?