Got A Pretty Penny? The China Daily Front Page Can Be Yours

China Daily LV cover
No one would confuse China Daily for a real newspaper — the kind that doesn’t write “A Friend’s Departure” on its front page when North Korea’s leader dies — but the company undoubtedly has real journalists on staff, veteran reporters who quietly toil within China’s noxious media environment to produce respectable work, and it’s those... Read more »

Man Ejaculates On Woman In Subway

I'm in the (homemade) Optimus Prime costume; Hong Kong subway, 2008
Image via here. In a story about ejaculation — featuring a heavy dose of it as the centerpiece, anyway — China Daily chose to go with the non-descriptive headline “Molesting suspect held by police,” not sure why. (I know why.) The story: The woman passenger, who was wearing denim shorts, said she suddenly felt something... Read more »

Have Problems In Sanlitun? Here’s The Cop Who Will Do Nothing About It

Sanlitun cop
Thanks, China Daily. Thanks for embedding a reporter deep inside the septic tank that is the Sanlitun Police Bureau and telling us it’s a lustrous fishbowl with that most exotic of exotic creatures, the officer who cares. This piece, in which reporter Cao Yin is allowed to tail “stocky” 44-year-old Zhang Tao, presumably to see... Read more »

China’s Official Press Agency Loves Those Sexy Teen Models

Xinhua, believe it or not
Let’s play a guessing game. What kind of website would host a series of pictures such as the above? (Too classy, probably.) Bro Bible? Frat House Sports? Slingshot? Surely one of those sites with features like “The 50 Bustiest Girls on Facebook” and pop-up video ads. One of those sites in which a new... Read more »

To Serve People: BJC’s New Weekly Column In Which Chinese Media Is Taken To The Stocks

To Serve People
The Top 4 Bullshit Editorials This Week | March 24-31 4. Heritage threatened as tomb-sweeping goes online Global Times | March 29 Tomb Sweeping Day is a yadayada bollockybollock from the reign of emperor Bull Wangle during the Hu Cares Dynasty in the Flerteenth Century. Apparently, people are doing whatever it is that people do on Tomb Sweeping Day online nowadays -- which, from the cartoon in Global Times, we can assume is getting high and watching Karate Kid through Wolverine claws: