Read: “The Biwalkers” And Other Stories From 4th Annual That’s Shanghai Erotic Fiction Competition

That's Shanghai erotic fiction
The bawdy and good folk of That's Shanghai have published the three winning entries from its erotic fiction competition held earlier this month at Glamour Bar as part of the Capital M Literary Festival. (You might remember Jacob Dreyer's review of the event for this site, which was heavy on Bai Ling.) As That's editor Ned Kelly so delicately summarizes:

First Lady Michelle Obama Feeding Pandas Makes For Innocent Viewing Delight

First Lady Michelle Obama Feeding Pandas featured image
I didn't intend to publish this video via WhiteHouse.gov's "The First Lady's Trip to China" blog -- it's Michelle Obama and her family's last day in China, spent in Chengdu with pandas -- but near the minute-mark, I found myself inadvertently chuckling at the sight of a panda pawing, with oversized mitts, at a slice of apple dangling from a hole, and -- you know what? -- why the heck not, here's the First Lady and family feeding pandas.

Finally, Someone Made It Happen: “The Panda,” A Parody Of Ylvis’s “The Fox”

The Panda - parody of Ylvis The Fox
Ylvis's hit "The Fox" (What Does the Fox Say?) was the surprise viral song of the late summer. We can't believe it's taken all of nearly two months, but here, finally, is a parody of that video set in China, featuring that other wonderfully mysterious creature of the woods, by which we mean -- of course -- the giant panda.

Panda Gives Birth To Year’s First Panda Twins

Panda gives birth to twins
Talk about a publicity and soft power machine for China. On Saturday, June 22, a female panda named Haizi gave birth to twins at a conservation center in Wolong, and everyone is talking about it, from BBC to AP to the Telegraph, which reports:

Please Enjoy This Adorable Red Panda Named Firefox Doing Pull-Ups In Fuzhou

Red panda does pull-ups 2
This is already more than a week old, but it's too good to dismiss on those grounds. Check out this red panda at the Fuzhou Panda World in Fujian province, being all adorable to ridiculous levels. His name is Firefox, and it's no mere raccoon. In this 30-second clip, it basically makes everyone forget that other type of panda. We're told the red pandas at this reserve can also balance on balls and ride electric vehicles.

This Is The Saddest Fucking Panda

Lanzhou panda
The Sina Weibo user who posted this picture, @哥不一搬3285043987, appears to have absonded from social media, but he/she thinks this giant panda in Lanzhou, Gansu province is dying because the zoo can’t feed it. The post: Lanzhou City Zoo’s panda is the world’s saddest panda. Thin and dirty. So hungry it can’t even walk. Supervisors... Read more »

Pandas Having Sex! [NSFW, If You Have Panda Coworkers]

Panda sex closeup
I don’t want to steal pageviews from Sina English, which has just published probably its funniest set of captions ever, so go over there and check out “Zoo plays AV to help pandas mate.” They run a total of three pictures, the captions to each are as follows:

What’s All The Hullaballoo Over Panda Poo Tea?

Smelling panda feces for tea
In many ways, it’s a story that combines everything that makes the Chinese media gush: pandas, tea, X-thousand years of culture, little children wearing cute costumes… And poop. Panda poop. That’s the recipe behind what some are calling the most expensive tea ever created. Selling for an eye-popping 440,000 RMB per kilogram (about $32,000 per... Read more »