Beijing To Get A Second Basketball Team: Shanxi’s

Shanxi Zhongyu Brave Dragons basketball team
A bombshell in the CBA: Boss Wang Xingquan of the Shanxi Zhongyu Brave Dragons has sold his team to Beijing Enterprises Group Co. Ltd., for 1.2 billion 120 million yuan (US $194.5 $19.5 million), according to Sina via NiuBBall. The Beijing-based investment group will be moving the team up north, to the nation’s capital, where Marcus Williams... Read more » Read more »

Acrobats, Miscommunication, And Luc Besson At The 3rd Annual Beijing International Film Festival

3rd annual Beijing International Film Festival
The closing ceremony for the third annual Beijing International Film Festival was held last Tuesday at the China National Convention Center, a multiplex which is the size and roughly the shape of an intergalactic ship docked on a bay of concrete just north of the National Aquatics Center on the Olympic Green. The event aims to be... Read more » Read more »

Overeager Penis Surgeon Misdiagnoses Cancer, Performs Unnecessary Genital Excision

Hand and scalpel
A 67-year-old man surnamed He who went in for a doctor’s visit earlier this year got a bit more than he asked for, according to an article published on Saturday on People’s Daily via China Business News. On February 8, He went to a hospital in Shangluo, Shanxi province complaining of swelling and discomfort around his... Read more » Read more »

Chinese Dance Instructor Physically And Verbally Assaults Teenage Students

Beijing dance instructor kicks students
A recently uploaded video by Youku user 比利时巧克力2, titled "Beijing dance instructor causes worldwide stir, physically and verbally assaults students," has been viewed 1.4 million times in the past three days. Chinese-version China Daily got in touch with the Youku user, who said the video comes from an (unidentified) international video-sharing site and was uploaded last November. Read more »

Snipped Django Set For Re-Release In China On May 7

Django Unchained full-frontal nudity
Django Unchained is ready for mainland Chinese theaters again. According to Sina, Quentin Tarantion’s revenge epic will be screened beginning May 7, with “full-frontal nudity removed.” There was hardly any full-frontal nudity in the movie to begin with, but if that’s what it takes, so be it. By now everyone who wants to see it... Read more » Read more »

When Good Officials Get Sacked, Like Yang Chengyi Of Earthquake-Stricken Qingyuan

Yang Changyi Sichuan
The first Chinese official to lose his job as a result of the Ya’an Earthquake is Yang Chengyi, 47, of Qingyuan township. Did he embezzle aid? Wear a gold watch? Smile while inspecting an accident site when he should have frowned? If only. According to SCMP, Yang was fired after failing to meet with disciplinary inspectors because... Read more » Read more »

Three Shots With… Sophie Cooke, Scottish Novelist

Beijing Cream Three Shots With Sophie Cooke
Welcome to Three Shots with Beijing Cream, where local personalities spill their beans 1.5 fluid ounces at a time. Produced and directed by Gabriel Clermont and Anthony Tao. Our guests this week aren't local per se, but Beijing honararies by virtue of their attendance at last month's Bookworm International Literary Festival. Writers from around the world converged on the Bookworm from March 8 to 22, but two were intrepid enough to plant themselves in front of our cameras' uncomfortably hot lights to field ridiculous, droll questions such as, "What is your favorite bar game?" Read more »

Neil Robinson Has Been Captured In Beijing, Will Be Handed Over To UK Police [UPDATE]

Neil Robinson captured in Beijing
Neil Robinson, 47, of Staines in Surrey, England, who has been wanted since 2002 for the distribution of underage porn and child rape, was detained by Beijing police early yesterday, according to Beijing News (which proceeds to ask many of the questions we've posed, and calls for increased background checks on foreign teachers). Read more »

Friday Night Musical Outro: Double Shot Of Li Daiguo

Li Daiguo
With all the festivals and hoopla and blah, blah, blah going on, this might be flying under your radar. It shouldn't. You should go. And you've got two chances on it so don't mess it up! So yeah. Tonight at Temple and tomorrow night at Zajia Lab, the good-time punks of Genjing Records are hosting record release concerts for their latest release, Music for Advertisements by Li Daiguo. That's him in the video. Read more »

Taiyuan Zookeepers Dress Up As Animals To Conduct Wacky, Furry Drill

Taiyuan Zoo training 1
It’s only natural for zookeepers to worry about caged animals getting loose. What is fairly obviously not normal, however, is having humans don animal suits to simulate this scenario, for “training” purposes. These pictures were taken recently from Taiyuan Zoo in Shanxi province. Look at this one: there’s a guy in a white lab coat... Read more » Read more »

Neil Robinson, That Alleged English-Teaching Rapist Fucker

Neil Robinson, alleged child rapist, teaching kids in Beijing
This fuckface. This fucking piece of shit is the new frog-eyed creepy rapist avatar for every foreign English teacher in China. I fucking hate him. As a reformed Catholic, I reserve vast reservoirs of contempt and genuine vitriol for authority figures who abuse their power at the expense of children. With all of my private and... Read more » Read more »

Chef Mistakes Pesticide For Sauce, Kills 1 And Leaves 20 Sick

Poison sauce
A chef’s carelessness has left one dead and 20 sick, including two in critical condition. Xinhua reports that a cook in Inner Mongolia mistakenly used pesticide, identified as carbofuran, instead of edible and non-poisonous sauce while whipping up lunch on Tuesday. Those who ingested it were migrant workers working on the Beijing-Tibet Expressway expansion project in Baotou, employed... Read more » Read more »

Boston Carjack Victim, A Chinese Entrepreneur, Describes Harrowing Encounter With Tsarnaev Brothers

ANDREW KITZENBERG/GETONHAND.COM
Last Thursday at 11 pm, a 26-year-old Chinese man parked his new Mercedes on Brighton Avenue. What happened next, we'll let the Boston Globe tell it. A man in dark clothes got out [of an old sedan that swerved behind him] and approached the passenger window. It was nearly 11 p.m. last Thursday. The man rapped on the glass, speaking quickly. Danny, unable to hear him, lowered the window -- and the man reached an arm through, unlocked the door, and climbed in, brandishing a silver handgun. Read more »

Chinagog: What “Chinese With Mike” Does Wrong, And What It Does Right

Chinagog - Chinese with Mike
So I just stumbled across Chinese with Mike. I can’t decide if this gentleman is the worst Chinese teacher since my boss forced my coworkers and I to learn “Tianmimi,” or the best Chinese teacher ever, like a mullet-enhanced Dashan. He certainly holds my interest as a Chinese language learner, and that’s half the battle.... Read more » Read more »