“Inaugural China Masturbation Contest” Is A Real Thing, There Are No Winners

Masturbation contest 2
Dudes wearing creepy, creepy masks pulled down their pants, held orange-red plastic pails over their privates, and masturbated while scantily-clad female models did sexually suggestive things, including with dildos and blow-up dolls. And it wasn’t for a porno — a terrible, terrible porno that no one would watch. Who wants to explain? “On the afternoon... Read more »

CCTV Sends Reporter Out To Ask About Sex Ed, Discovers Horrible, Hilarious Truths About How Babies Are Made

How did you learn about sex? At school, from a teacher? Or at home, from parent? Maybe a relative, or a cousin, or sibling? Or perhaps you discovered it by accident, around the same time you discovered a titty magazine, glossed with the allure of eroticism: the power of posture, the penetrative glance, deep-plunging appeal.... Read more »

Boobs And Crystal Cars At The Guangzhou Auto Show

Crystal car
Chinese auto shows are special, able to launch a model’s career in much the same way that American Idol launches pop careers, but when scantily-clad adults are too passe and scantily-clad five-year-olds are too controversial, what does an organizer do? In Guangdong province, where the 10th Guangzhou International Automobile Exhibition opened on Friday (extended from seven to 10 days),... Read more »

Here’s The 18-Year-Old Who Got A Party Boss Fired, And Of Course Bo Xilai And Wang Lijun Are Involved, Because Chongqing

Zhao Hongxia 2
The Chongqing sex scandal is getting very, very interesting. Whatever intrigue was already inherent in a scandal involving a high-ranking Party official and his mistress, raise it to the power of Wang Lijun and Bo Xilai. Let’s start here: The femme fatale has been identified as Zhao Hongxi, who was 18 years old in February 2007... Read more »

We’re Sorry If This Gives You Nightmares, But This Is Hu Jintao’s “O” Face

Hu Jintao on Beautiful Agony
We’ve spliced together Hu Jintao, China’s outgoing leader, and Beautiful Agony, a website that… Beautiful Agony began as an experiment*, to test a theory that eroticism in human imagery lies not in the body, but in the face; that film of a genuine, unscripted, natural orgasm can succeed where the most visceral mainstream pornography fails,... Read more »

Need A Job? Shanghai Company Seeks “Condom Testers”

Condom testing ad
Screenshot of original ad after the jump; the above pic is via Weibo, @shdaily. Wanted: Condom Tester. Must Be Female, Good-Looking, Between The Ages Of 18 and 25. No, seriously. The ad has been removed, but for a while, “lively and good-looking women” between 18 and 25 were given the chance to apply to test... Read more »

17-Year-Old In Fujian, Ashamed Of Getting Erections, Turns To Self-Castration

I don't want to know
Image via 7y7.com A 17-year-old in Anxi, Fujian province tried to cut off his penis to spite his out-of-control teenage and totally normal hormonal drive. Thankfully for him, he was not successful. According to Strait Metropolis Daily, the 17-year-old was at home Saturday, in bed, when he took a knife and tried to castrate himself.... Read more »

Our Very Own RFH Reports From The Guangzhou Sex Culture Festival

Jissbon, by RFH
The Guangzhou Sex Culture Festival ended Monday, but we have a couple more related items in the pipeline. For now, check BJC Editor-at-Large RFH’s dispatch about the three-day event in The Times: There’s not much actual sex going on at the 10th Annual Guangzhou International Sex Culture Festival – pornography, prostitution and public nudity are... Read more »

Probably The Best Picture From The Guangzhou Sex Festival

GZ Sex Festival
We brought you pictures of the 10th annual Guangzhou Sex Culture Festival yesterday evening, but by far the best picture from that event — which, sadly, ends today — is the one above. I want you to notice the small gray box that is partially obscuring the picture of the woman’s breast on the left... Read more »

Your First Look At The 10th Guangzhou Sex Culture Festival

GZ Sex Festival
The Guangzhou Sex Culture Festival is always a big deal because, you know, sex. Created in 2003 by Zhang Feng, a soldier-turned government official who goes by “Brother Feng” in his books, Guangzhou’s annual sex lollapalooza draws hundreds of thousands of visitors every year. “Sex is like food,” Zhang said in a 2010 interview. “It functions at the very... Read more »

“Automatic Sperm Extractor” Is Bizarre, Wonderful

Sperm extractor
Found in a Nanjing hospital, this device is very much used for what you might think. That is to say, it is not a fleshlight masquerading as a mushroom; it is an artificial vagina that serves the purpose of actual vaginas: to extract sperm from male genitalia. Hard stop. And the best part is that it... Read more »

A Film To Get Drunk With: Due West: Our 3D Sex Journey

Due West - Our 3D Sex Journey featured image 2
Quoting what appears to be an official film synopsis: Due West: Our Sex Journey describes the internal struggle of a young person seeking “love” and “lust” in contemporary society of Hong Kong. The film reflects the reason why men head North to Mainland to seek pleasure and the general problems exist among Hong Kong girls. It also focuses on the intricate conflict of the two-sided coin of love – affection and lust.

Wanker Fails To Fill Sperm Receptacle, Dies Instead

Zheng Gang, a PhD student, died while donating sperm at Tongji Medical College of Huazhong University of Science and Technology on February 2011, and thanks to a lawsuit his father filed for 4 million yuan, we get to hear all about the country’s (world’s?) first known case of a man dying while donating sperm. Reports China... Read more »

The Model For Zhengzhou’s “Filial Pigs” Sculpture Depicts An Orgy, Most Definitely Not Filial

Is this filial as well?
We’ve had our fun with this, now it’s time to drop the hammer. Earlier today, Wuhan Evening Paper reported that Zhengzhou’s now-infamous “filial pigs” — a mother and son in a pose suggestive of anything but filial piety — was in fact based off a statuette from a series called “Hooligan Pigs,” created 10 years... Read more »

Remember Those Porking Pigs? Here’s A Video

Remember Those Porking Pigs
Some people really want this sculpture to be just a son massaging his mother, whose quivering eyes are merely grateful and on her ruddy face the arpeggio of delight turned ecstatic is divested of all venereal context. Not really sure why her left nipple is exposed though.

What Is A Chinese Orgy Actually Like?

Orgy PS
China has been abuzz over orgies recently, thanks to a set of scandalous pictures that surfaced last week featuring three pairs of swingers. (You can see several of these 120-some NSFW photos here.) Amid speculation (since dispelled) that the men were high-ranking government officials, one of the men, Wang Yu, confessed to being in the... Read more »