If ChinaSmack Gets Harmonized Soon, We Can All Blame That Prick Dashan

ChinaSmack has been one of the most popular China blogs on the Internet basically since its inception in the summer of 2008, after it “broke the Internet” by publishing a post titled “Naked Chinese Girl Attacked By Cantonese Teens” with accompanying video (the video has since been removed). It’s built quite a formidable team of translators and has posted regularly ever since, translating Chinese netizen opinions on hot-button issues. It’s not exactly a moral compass, considering it’s as likely to scrabble around the bottom of barrels as it is to survey the creme, but in its own small yet significant way, it helps bridge the cultural divide between China and the English-speaking world. And its glossary of slang, if you haven’t already seen it, is a gem of a resource for Chinese learners. Basically, everyone has heard of ChinaSmack.

Everyone, that is, except Dashan, i.e. Mark Rowswell, i.e. That Asshole Dashan, who recently wrote on Sina Weibo (as translated by ChinaSmack): “@大山: A very interesting website, using English to introduce China’s internet culture to the world. Very frank, without being modified/tempered.” (一个很有意思的网站,用英文向世界介绍中国的网络文化。很直白,不修饰。) And now, lots of people — rightfully — are worried that Chinese authorities will soon “harmonize” the site, moving it to the dark side of the Great Firewall.

Those who have experience in Chinese media will tell you that when it comes to writing about China, anything goes except the truth. (I say this tongue-in-cheek — please understand that I do work in Chinese media.) That is, stories that hew too closely to reality — especially the bleak kind — are more liable to get axed, most likely by a deputy editor afraid of attracting the wrong kind of attention. When one makes a habit of writing close to truths that make China look bad to foreigners — that is, airing dirty laundry in public, every stain in plain sight — one really crosses into a dangerous territory.

Then again, as anyone who works in media also knows, the censors are reliably fickle. So who knows, maybe ChinaSmack will survive after all.

One thing’s certain though: Dashan can be a dick sometimes. As I’ve said about him before:

The Beijinger wasted an entire blog post on Dashan, asking questions such as “Is it time to stop hating him already?” and “Or is it just jealousy?” They completely miss the point. Most mammals feel a natural aversion to Dashan because he looks like this:

17 Responses to “If ChinaSmack Gets Harmonized Soon, We Can All Blame That Prick Dashan”

  1. Joel

    I used to have a blog in which I vented about people and things in China. It was great. Then my boss found it and told me I was a bad person and decided not to sponsor my visa. That was not so great.

    Write on, brave Tao. Write on for the rest of us mammals.

    Reply
  2. Liu Xiang

    This is unacceptable; Dashan has work hard for lot years, forgoing family ties and responsibility to elderly parents and chance of creating happy family of his own. By personally sacrificing good life among his own people in developed west country, he has come China to help bridge cultural difficulties and stop historical bloodshed. Dashan can speak perfect Chinese, how many other foreigners can speak even basic hello? He work hard, with very little in return. We should thank Dashan. One day they will build his statue, high and gold in important place in big city in China. then you will say sorry. he is right

    Reply
    • donscarletti

      “你好”,是不是“hello”的意思? 我不知道因为我是个外国白痴,请给我讲一下,怎么给别人问好?

      他大部分时间住在加拿大,如果他不养老就是因为他的性格怀,如果没有孩子就是因为他阳痿,都不是为了中国。

      其实我觉得他的相声比较幽默,尤其那个打电话找周润发的,我第一次看到的时候我不停地笑,但是你从来没说”他幽默“,也没说”他的相声表演好“,没说”他说的话很有道理“,你只说他是个外国人但是他还会说中文,因为除了那两个特点以外你什么都没看到。所以他叫耍猴,可能猴子不知道他在跳舞,可能舞者不知道他是猴子,但是确是耍猴。

      大山很可能是好人,但是他最大的问题是他的耍猴表演会让你这样人种主意着确认你的看法。

      Reply
  3. Scott

    What the Harmonizers don’t understand is that no one has to do anything whatsoever to make China look bad to us foreigners. No need for searing comments on the web, in news papers, on news broadcasts, none of that. The common daily practices of the average “higher moral standard” Chinese citizen is plenty to those of us with boots on the ground over here. Don’t get me wrong, I love it here, but every single god damned day, this one single thought passes through my mind at least once if not several times: “These people are fucked up.”

    Reply
  4. Mike

    Been having major problems getting on Chinasmack since the Roswell incident, looks like he isn’t a man of his word, who’d have guessed!

    Reply

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