Good news and bad news for Beijingers: according to the Ministry of Environmental Protection, Beijing is only the ninth most polluted city in the country.
Unbelievable as that is for those who lived through the last month, here’s the bad news: six of the most polluted cities are in neighboring Hebei province. No. 7 is Jinan in bordering Shandong, and No. 8 is right back to Hebei.
In other words:
You know how Beijing is a bowl that traps pollution? Look at the map. Hebei surrounds Beijing completely. We’re constantly under attack by our neighbors’ particulate death matter. Our only hope is to flee to the sea.
What’s that, Tianjin is in the way? Fuck it. Death by smog it is.