Those wonderful viral marketers at Durex -- who were responsible for this ad that implied Barack Obama has a bigger penis than Mitt Romney -- sprinkled some photoshop magic to one particular photo of Xi Jinping and Peng Liyuan that's been making the rounds.
In the original -- somewhat lampooned because China's First Lady is using an iPhone -- Xi Jinping definitely does not have a condom in his breast pocket.
There are two kinds of masturbators: those who lie about doing it, and those who don't. Check out which is which in the above video, brought to us by Ministry of Tofu.
A little spoiler alert: more women admit to it than men. Hmm.
Context?
It’s not shameful to seek a companion to calm the exigencies of the heart, which swell like waves and retreat as quickly to beach sorrow on the shores of our body.
But this woman — Liang Yali — is a swindler and sham. We think. Because what kind of slick snake salesperson would take advantage of another person’s loneliness to charge these prices — as reported by SCMP — for something called the Seek-a-Husband Training Programme?
We talk about censors as if they weren't real, but SCMP serves us this useful reminder that the people deleting your videos, expurgating articles, handcuffing artists, destroying the TV and entertainment industry, and -- the of course of "of courses" -- blocking porn, are made of flesh and blood, with intellectual capacities, however stunted, and human desires.
Well, some used to have human desires, before they were forced to watch porn all day. Desensitized, sex is but gymnastics with bad theatrics, something to pass the time, like a run on the treadmill.
Check out this young couple on the Taipei subway: he reads a book while she, um, sleeps on his lap... with a jacket over her head... bobbing up and down.
Yeah.
Sneaky, naughty, and bookish. Kids these days.
A professor at Guangzhou’s Sun Yat-sen University is soliciting tapes, poems, plays, and songs about masturbation as part of a research project-cum-contest called “New Media Contest on Masturbation.” As SCMP reports, “The rules are simple: submit your masturbation videos, poems, plays, or songs,” and the winner gets 10,000 yuan, with hefty cash prizes for second,... Read more »
I don’t want to steal pageviews from Sina English, which has just published probably its funniest set of captions ever, so go over there and check out “Zoo plays AV to help pandas mate.” They run a total of three pictures, the captions to each are as follows:
“The mighty women of Chengdu, ‘raping’ a man on the street,” reads the opening to this Sina Weibo post. With all the usual disclaimers that this is hearsay, let us continue:
Those who use Momo and, to a lesser extent (but not much lesser), WeChat probably already know this, but social Apps are great for finding new and -- how shall we say -- temporary friends. However, if you are cruising around in the great murky sea trawling for bottles or booty, you open yourself up to getting hooked, too. Really open yourself up, actually, because you're going up against professionals.
Here’s a political sex scandal out of Jiangxi province with an unexpected twist. Qu Wenyuan, a village-level party secretary in Nanchang, Jiangxi, was recently suspended after his girlfriend posted a naked photo of him on Sina Weibo. Shanxi Evening News reports that Hu Dandan (pseudonym) posted the picture possibly as payback for his “corruption and gambling,” evidence for... Read more »
