Dashan: ‘I Can’t Remember Any Of My Friends Or Acquaintances Using Terms Like That Since We Were In Junior High And Didn’t Yet Really Understand What A Vagina Is.’

He’s a charmer, that Dashan. Yesterday we posted about how cute it was that he — China expert Mark Rowswell — finally discovered ChinaSmack, one of the most popular China blogs on the Internet, and today we find out that he likes ChinaSmack so much that he’s posting multiple comments.

Many of ChinaSmack’s commenters cower before his presence, going, OOPS! Sorry for making fun of you, Dashan! I’m actually a fan!

But here at Beijing Cream, we’d like to present a counterargument: Dashan is still a prick. Why would we say that about this real-life Canadian hero? Let us count the reasons…

1. Dashan tells ChinaSmack what it is that ChinaSmack does, with a real dickish parenthetical:

I posted this because I think many Chinese netizens often feel it’s impossible for foreigners to understand their world. In fact, sites like chinaSMACK (you’re not the only one) do provide a window into China that is very current and direct, and easily available to anyone that’s interested.

2. Dashan says being harmonized “is a fact of life in China” before continuing his lecture for the ChinaSmack commentariat:

As for the danger of being harmonized, that is a fact of life in China. Of course Chinese don’t like to make their country look bad, and I’m sure a lot of ordinary Chinese (not to mention the government) are uncomfortable with the idea that this side of China is being shown around the world. On the other hand, everything you are posting here is content that is widely distributed inside of China anyway, and the Chinese government is clearly much less interested in anything that is said in English as opposed to Chinese. Whatever is said or written in English doesn’t really matter that much, simply because it doesn’t have a big impact inside China anyway.

3. Dashan tells the ChinaSmack commentariat who ChinaSmack’s audience is:

And besides, your primary audience is non-Chinese and people that should be web-savvy enough to know how to use a proxy, so what do you care if you’re harmonized or not?

The above were the first three paragraphs in his first comment. Shall we continue?

4. When asked, “You don’t read The China Daily or 21st Century English language newspapers much do you Dashan”:

Of course not, ha ha! Those papers are absolutely irrelevant. They’re only published for show, and to help Chinese university students practice their English.

5. Dashan delivers “parting words,” gets all Jesus-like:

To all those people who always wanted to insult me to my face, consider it Mission Accomplished, ha ha! Yes, in fact I did read your comment and am aware how much you hate me. Just wanted to reassure you of that. I still love all of you.

6. Then this:

In all honesty, from the comments here one can tell that chinaSMACK’s readers (at least the ones that post comments) tend to be quite young and not necessarily very knowledgeable about China. I think that reinforces the argument that chinaSMACK is doing a great job in explaining this part of China to an audience that really needs to know more about China.

7. This:

I honestly don’t know anyone over the age of 20 who uses a word like “douche bag” (OK, for those picky people — two words). I can’t remember any of my friends or acquaintances using terms like that since we were in junior high and didn’t yet really understand what a vagina is.

8. This:

Keep up the good work, guys. Don’t let the readers get you down!

I post the above without any beef at all with Dashan. His existence is simply amusing to me. And — because he’s a smart guy with savvy instincts for entertainment — I trust he’s amused by all this, too.

Keep up the good work, Dashan. Never change.

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