Here’s how to make a jidan guanbing, those delicious baked flat cakes lined with egg and rolled over a piece of chicken and lettuce, as demonstrated by Andrew Moffat:
Consume. Sleep. Regret.
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Waaaaah…foreigner sooooo crever
Points at 洋鬼子 mouth agape for 3 hours straight.
Dear Mom and Dad,
Teaching English in China has been an awarding experience. Everyone thinks I am so cool and handsome, they love my twat haircut. Last Tuesday night after drinking with my new best friends(who are also teachers) and making fun of Chinese people, I made a an egg cake! It was so funny, I bet no other foreigner has come to China and done this. I really feel so accepted here. See you in a few years.
Love,
Twatface son
P.S. Please leave my room alone, I will need to stay with you when I get back.
Yes, there have been pics of foreigners in China doing this before. But how cool is Lao White for a) the oh-so impressive pun-themed moniker and b) just for being awesome. And then there is Rick Moranis aka Dark Helmet, even cooler than Lao White. Looking down on all the plebeian English teachers from your ivory tower so be so rewarding. Because you are so cool.
Glad you’ve accepted the truth. Now bow, dog.