This is how escalation works. First there are 900 dead pigs in a Shanghai river. Then there are 16,000 dead pigs, plus a thousand or so dead ducks. Then there are dead humans… aaaannd this game is over. The government of Lanzhou, capital of Gansu province, announced on March 28 that “around 100 bodies on... Read more »
"Squid bomb" can refer to squid jigs for catching squids, a World War II anti-submarine weapon, or this annoying video featuring Squidward Tentacles. It's never meant to be taken literally, i.e. a bomb inside a squid.
Until now. Now it can mean exactly that: a bomb inside a squid.
As if 16,000 ducking pigs in the river wasn’t enough of a prodigious ducking fact, Danwei tells us more than a thousand dead fucks have now been found in a Chinese river. The front page of the Tianfu Morning News (天府早报) from Sichuan province today reports that on the afternoon of 19 March, more than a thousand dead ducks were... Read more »
“Well,” says the at the 4-minute mark of his opening monologue, “it seems the number of dead pigs found floating in a river in Shanghai has now risen to over 13,000.” An Angry Birds joke follows, which is lame. “Chinese officials said the dead pigs won’t affect the quality of drinking water in the river,” he... Read more »
Because getting the updated dead swine count in Shanghai’s Huangpu River is like morning coffee, here’s AFP: The number of dead pigs found in a river which runs through Shanghai has reached nearly 15,000, officials and reports said Tuesday, as a newspaper claimed the government was concealing the true tally.
-- How do you like your eggs?
-- Unfertilized?
-- Oh. Um.
-- What's wrong?
-- Nothing, it's just that I was hoping you'd say within an egg.
A chicken in Guizhou province has laid a monster half-pound egg, but it's not a world record, explains the Los Angeles Times:
Seriously, now: forget the jokes, forget about water safety concerns, forget everything until this question is answered: what possibly could have gone through the mind of the homicidal pig farmer who dumped more than 6,000 pigs into the Huangpu River? Did a pig farm explode? Does circovirus cause pigs to go mad and jump in... Read more »
Unsatisfied with “hogwash,” “bay of pigs,” and “bacon” — all perfectly good and scurvy ways of describing the deathcarts of pig carcasses dredged out of the upper regions of Shanghai’s Shuangpu River this week — we now have “pigfestation,” courtesy of Bloomberg Businessweek:
Babe: Pig in the Drinking Water. You've read the story, seen the video (above, if you haven't). Now hear what the Onion, et al., have to say about the thousands of dead pigs in the Huangpu River, a source of "most" of Shanghai's drinking water for its 23 million residents.
