After Arrest Of Chinese American Microblog Celebrity Charles Xue, Global Times Editor Hu Xijin Reminds Us Why He’s An Ass

Charles Xue
Chinese American angel investor and Sina Weibo celebrity Charles Xue (a.k.a. Xue Manzi, with more than 12 million followers) has been detained in Beijing for "suspected involvement in prostitution," China News reported on Sunday. On August 23, off the tip from a local resident, Chaoyang District police captured Xue along with a 22-year-old woman from Henan province in a residential compound, according to the official weibo of Beijing Public Security Office:

About That Tiananmen Tank Man Image In Cirque du Soleil’s Beijing Show

Tiananmen Tank Man at Cirque du Soleil
On Friday, the opening night of Cirque du Soleil's three-night performance of Michael Jackson: The Immortal World Tour in Beijing, a highly sensitive image was displayed on the giant big-screens above the stage in Wukesong MasterCard Arena: the Tiananmen Tank Man. As first reported by a local magazine, then excerpted by Shanghaiist:

WSJ Says Its Chinese Website Is Not Blocked In China

WSJ Chinese no longer blocked 2
On August 3 at 2:50 pm, the influential political blogger and journalist Michael Anti tweeted that Wall Street Journal's Chinese website, cn.wsj.com, had been blocked within China. That afternoon, after testing on multiple browsers, we emailed WSJ for a comment, then posted a story announcing WSJ Chinese had been harmonized, i.e. could only be accessible in China with a VPN. Two hours ago, Kathy from Dow Jones's Hong Kong office emailed back:

The Hadrian Firewall Of Britain Will Keep Us Safe

David Cameron as Big Brother
Today, barbarians of the unruly and unruled Internet are less dangerous. Today, your sleep will be sounder, your dreams more colorful, your future freer. For today, Britain, you are one step closer to achieving China's harmony-promoting, children-protecting Net filtration system, which we lovingly refer to as the Great Firewall. And how great it is: no porn, because it can be eradicated like rats; no discussion of historical events, so as not to offend the sensibilities of certain mothers who would prefer to forget those things ever happened; no YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, New York Times, or Bloomberg, because screw 'em; and no dissent (and why would there be dissent?). Hadrian's Firewall, we'll call it. You'll love it, as we do.

Popular VPN Service Astrill Is Down Because Of DDoS Attack, Company Reveals On Twitter

Astrill GFWed
Astrill wants its users to know it was the target of a distributed denial-of-service (DDoS) attack yesterday, and that they "are experiencing technical issues with our API servers," and are investigating, and "apologize for any inconvenience this may cause." Unfortunately, if you are in China and only use Astrill, it's unlikely you've gotten this message (unless you happened to see it on Reddit). Astrill's been tweeting, beginning with this 13 hours ago:

Here’s Xi Jinping And Barack Obama As Winnie The Pooh And Tigger

Winnie the Pooh Xi Jinping and Barack Obama 2
The above was posted to Sina Weibo recently and was, of course, deleted. If it doesn't seem like a picture that compares China's president to a chubby bear with a sweet tooth would be allowed to stand, it's because a picture that compares China's president to a chubby bear with a sweet tooth isn't allowed to stand, even if it's done in good fun (as the above obviously is). But as we've said before: censors don't like fun. (They prefer their jobs.)

Durex Learns You’re Not Allowed To Photoshop A Condom Into Xi Jinping’s Breast Pocket

Xi Jinping Durex ad
Those wonderful viral marketers at Durex -- who were responsible for this ad that implied Barack Obama has a bigger penis than Mitt Romney -- sprinkled some photoshop magic to one particular photo of Xi Jinping and Peng Liyuan that's been making the rounds. In the original -- somewhat lampooned because China's First Lady is using an iPhone -- Xi Jinping definitely does not have a condom in his breast pocket.

To Serve People Tiananmen Special: The Global Times Reminds You To Shut The Fuck Up

TAR Tiananmen 1
Global Times chose June 4 to publish two editorials about how the Internet and media need to be brutally censored. One editorial is by Shan Renping -- the party’s stupidest editorial lapdog -- and the other is from the rat-infested oozing pile of vomit and bile shat through the vagina of a dead yet zombified tapeworm screaming at the top of its intestines, Hu Xijin. Let’s start with Hu: “Web regulation in public's best interest”

Please Read Murong Xuecun’s Open Letter To His Censor

Murong Xuecun's open letter to his censor
Murong Xuecun has seen all his microblogs deleted (May 11), reinstated (May 17), and deleted again (May 18). Anyone who gets jerked around like this has reason to be upset; Murong, more so, considering he had millions of followers and thousands of entries accumulated over three years, and because, as he himself puts it, "to a writer, the words he writes are more important to him than his life."

Murong Xuecun: “Who Gives You The Power To Deprive Citizens Of Their Right To Free Speech?”

Murong Xuecun
Hao Qun, 39, better known by his pen name Murong Xuecun, saw all of his weibos -- Sina, Tencent, NetEase, and Sohu -- deleted on Saturday. Successive attempts to re-register were quickly thwarted as well. He lost 1.85 million followers, but it's China and its ignoble band of fucking censors who have lost more: repute. Face. Or does that suddenly not matter?

Senior Chinese Pornography Censor Watches A Lot Of Porn, Hates It

Senior porn official, 70, hates his censorship job
We talk about censors as if they weren't real, but SCMP serves us this useful reminder that the people deleting your videos, expurgating articles, handcuffing artists, destroying the TV and entertainment industry, and -- the of course of "of courses" -- blocking porn, are made of flesh and blood, with intellectual capacities, however stunted, and human desires. Well, some used to have human desires, before they were forced to watch porn all day. Desensitized, sex is but gymnastics with bad theatrics, something to pass the time, like a run on the treadmill.

PEN International Launches Full Assault On Chinese Censorship

The Pen Report on Chinese censorship
Do you share our disdain for censorship? If so, it's not too late to check out last week's PEN International report on Chinese censorship, "Creativity and Constraint in Today's China." Launched on World Press Freedom Day as a culmination of five years of work, "the report is a frank assessment of the climate of freedom of expression in the world’s most populous state," featuring firsthand accounts and essays from 10 Chinese dissident writers.

South Beijing Teeming With Police In Response To Massive Protest After Death Of Allegedly Gang-Raped Girl [UPDATE]

Yongdingmen2 3
A massive police and paramilitary presence has descended upon Fengtai District around Jingwen Clothing and Apparel Shopping Mall, the scene of either a suicide or murder last Friday. On May 3, a young woman from Anhui province fell to her death from the Jingwen building after allegedly being gang-raped. Police hastily ruled her death a suicide and refused her family's request to see the surveillance footage. This afternoon, thousands (edit: possibly only "hundreds") of people -- many who are migrant workers from Anhui -- gathered in a planned protest between Jingwen and Yongdingmen, a gate just south of the Temple of Heaven on Second Ring Road (a few kilometers north of Jingwen). Hundreds of police have shown up in turn, many in riot gear. Traffic is reportedly backed up for miles.

Snipped Django Set For Re-Release In China On May 7

Django Unchained full-frontal nudity
Django Unchained is ready for mainland Chinese theaters again. According to Sina, Quentin Tarantion’s revenge epic will be screened beginning May 7, with “full-frontal nudity removed.” There was hardly any full-frontal nudity in the movie to begin with, but if that’s what it takes, so be it. By now everyone who wants to see it... Read more »