Sorry about the low-res image... it's exactly what appears on CW's website. I didn't have the heart to make it cute.
While the Beijinger‘s bloated and brassy PR machine pumps its little steam-piston legs to spread the gospel of the Beijing Expat’s Preference of Place to Get Shitfaced, here’s Grandpa City Weekend shuffling onto the front porch with a tin walker missing a wheel, his hoarse voice rasping into the desolate cockcrow, unaware that it’s 5 am: “Hey. Heyyyyyy. And the winner of the best Beijing-based DJ of the year… Eddie LV. What the Sonny Liston is an LV?” Here’s the full list. We’re particularly confused by why Cepe (on Ritz-Carlton Financial Street, as CW tells us) won the Reader’s Choice for Best Italian Restaurant, while LMPlus won the Editor’s Pick and Bene and Prego both received Honorable Mentions. (Like, all-around confused.) What’s less confusing is why Daniel Urdaneta won the Reader’s Choice for Chef of the Year — I’m guessing it’s because he’s quoted every other month in City Weekend because Mosto is an advertiser. (You didn’t hear that from me though.) Also, is it Reader’s or Readers’? I’m OK with either, but not even City Weekend’s editors seem to know, seeing as how there’s a discrepancy in the article and the logo [8:03 pm: SEE UPDATE AFTER JUMP]. We’ll go with “Reader’s” for the hell of it. I really don’t have any more to say, though I do hold out hope that this year’s CW Reader’s Choice Awards Party video will feature Brooke Hogan. UPDATE, 8:03 pm: The editors have decided: it’s Readers’. Missed one though: 
Dear Beijing Cream,
While I enjoy your acid-tongue, and think you make many strong points, I am confused WHY exactly you spend all your time deriding Beijinger and City Weekend so often.
Are you an editor at a competing expat magazine? Because you seem to have an awful lot vested in tearing down all these awards (which I agree are rigged and bogus), and you also seem to KNOW a lot about each of these bars and restaurants (beyond the normal expat in Beijing).
So, just wondering if you’ll be providing some full disclosure about yourself any time soon, because the anonymity and mysterious motives is not doing much to help your credibility and cause no matter how funny and enjoyable your blog is.
Thank you in advance for publishing and not deleting my comment.
http://bit.ly/KcgcY3
In all seriousness, drop me a note and I’ll explain: tao@beijingcream.com. I don’t mean to be callous.
Dear Confused in Beijing,
While I enjoy your meaningless existence, and think you doth protest too much, I am confused WHY exactly you spend all your time deriding Beijing Cream so often.
Are you a talentless editor at City Weekend? Because you seem to have an awful lot vested in tearing down this blog post (which I agree is awesome), and you also seem to KNOW nothing about how to read a byline and Google a name (beyond the normal idiot in Beijing).
So, just wondering if you’ll be providing some full disclosure about yourself any time soon, because the anonymity and mysterious motives is not doing much to help your credibility and cause no matter how dull and inane your comment is.
Thank you in advance for publishing and not deleting my comment.
“And the winner of the best Beijing-based DJ of the year… Eddie LV” = award for constantly playing music at exactly the same speed.
Kos? As in…..
“Another big problem with the whole shebang was that Jonathan Kos-Read was there. And no one, not a single soul, punched him in the face or stabbed him in the heart or hurled santorum in his face or circumcised him or drank from his skull. What a letdown.”
http://beijingcream.com/2012/05/the-only-review-of-the-beijinger-awards-party-youre-ever-likely-to-read/#more-2766
Seems like there’s a lot of love for John Kos-Read out there.
Meanwhile, nearly a week later and the Beijinger is still tweeting its way through the list of Bar Awards… I personally seeing nothing wrong with your ongoing mockery.