The Situation Is Excellent: The Week That Was At Beijing Cream

January 28 – February 3

We spoof the Beijinger’s covers. The WCBA finals kicked off with a bang. PSY will be performing in Shanghai for Chinese New Year, writes James Tiscione (also: watch this Gangnam Style flipbook). Meanwhile, Didier Drogba is leaving Shanghai (or trying).

China has probably hacked New York Times, et al., while John Artman writes about how safe the rest of us are. Pollution settles over China, to the media’s joy. Chen Guangbiao sells canned air.

A Guangzhou sinkhole devoured buildings. Dartz is selling a million-dollar vehicle, and it’s kinda (but not) a tank. Blogger Zhu Ruifeng got harassed by police for exposing government officials. Hong Kong is serious about protecting its powdered milk supplies. A foreigner streaked through Beijing’s airport, while a toddler pooped in Taiwan’s airport.

Thirty-eight minutes of Cloud Atlas was censored in China. Someone started a petition to the White House to punish the architects of the Great Firewall. Watch the Super Bowl in Beijing.

Comment of the Week:

“Typical BeijingCream Commenter” on our the Beijinger spoof:

Is this supposed to be funny? Because I honestly can’t find any fucking humor in this at all. In fact I haven’t laughed once since 1989. Hopefully the CCPC will come to their senses and apologize for those terrible crimes. Read my book, Staring Down Tanks: The Only Real Man In China, to learn more about what happened that day. Besides that, excuse me while I go wipe my ass with something else readable.

Jonathan Alpart:

My god, the next student from ISB that I encounter I am punching in the fucking face.

Context here.

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