The Situation Is Excellent: The Week That Was At Beijing Cream

December 10 – December 16

Liao Yiwu, the German Peace Prize winner, organized a streaking outside the Nobel Banquet in Stockholm on Monday. Foreign VPNs are supposedly illegal in China, in a story featuring Global Times’s bizarre use of the word “however.” Jaywalking in Beijing is also not allowed — who knew? Chinese netizens realized that Xinhua has a Twitter account, and they weren’t too happy about it.

A five-year-old was run over by a minibus, and few did anything to help. On the other hand: a dog refused to leave his fallen owner, a Swedish man saved a drowning woman, and Beijing subway passengers did all they could to save a man who fell onto the tracks.

The Beijinger columnist George Ding wrote a humor piece that was lost in translation. Beijingers protested a high-speed rail line that would cut too close to a residential community; operative word “protested.” Tracy McGrady had a pretty rough week: first he ran off the court with diarrhea, then he elbowed a Beijing player in a blowout lost. Here’s how you can save an ancient Buddhist city threatened by a Chinese copper mine.

A Chinese woman was Tasered for trying to buy too many iPhones in New Hampshire. Police chief Qi Fang lost his job over these two sisters (pictures), though he denies having sex with them. A woman died on her way to a Beijing hospital because there was too much traffic. Here’s the official 2013 China holiday schedule — it’s wacky.

The Good Doctor followed Santas around Beijing. Barack Obama’s Newtown address has been viewed lots of times in this country, as the world watches to see if the US moves to restrict gun ownership. And introducing: Xi Jinping looking at things.

Comment of the Week:

Kai Ni Nai Nai, on our post about today’s BJC gathering at Great Leap Brewing (featuring an interview with Carl Setzer):

I wouldn’t be going to this party. Word on the street is as you advertised it there’s a number of Beijing expats you slagged off this year you’ll be turning up seeking revenge. 2-1 on you’ll get a huge fight, inside or outside. If I was Anthony Tao I wouldn’t be advertising where and when I am going to be hanging about in a bar in Beijing, no way. This is going to be a car crash this afternoon. You’d better get some heavies ready I predict it is goingt o get nasty.

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2 Responses to “The Situation Is Excellent: The Week That Was At Beijing Cream”

  1. Beijing Spunked

    IT WASN”T FUCKING EXCELLENT. You got me out on Sunday believeing in you fo you BEIJING CREAM PAARRTYYYY – Dudes, 30 people turned up, Chinese students, one barrel of beer, one ‘donated’ by the bar it was a sad ass deal. Then the beer ran out and everyone left to go get pizza. Crappy Sunday man I thought it would be fun but yowse are just a lame version of Hidden Harmonies. Deadsville dude. You ain’t mashing it despite your hype. You are party dullsville. Aint nuting her ‘cept trolls trying to screw some sad ass bucks in ad revs by being CONTRAVERSHAAAAL and dissing some big names for page views. Seen it before bro’s, yo’ wasted. Bye bue Beijing Cream. You spunked too hard.

    You Big Mouths no substance and have the CHEEK to ask people for ADVERYTSING MONIES.

    I see better shyatt on Hidden Harmonies Chinese racist crap and they don’t ask for money like yo muthafuckers who cant make a party happen. It was shit man thats why you fill these pages up with stoopid “news” to forget you embarrasments.

    Reply
    • Anthony Tao

      I’ll let this comment stand because it’s the longest out of your five; the others I’ve marked — reasonably, I think you’ll agree — as spam.

      I like your style. Lay off the copy-and-paste and we’ll get along well here.

      Reply

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